In the quiet of my heart: unsettled.

It’s Wednesday morning. The restless feeling has crept it’s way back into the quiet reservation of my heart. It comes and goes, but lately it has lingered. Some may call this depression. I don’t. I cannot deny the aching restlessness that prompts me to look further, the one that gently speaks to me, whispering made for more.

No, I am not unable, inactive or dejected.

I am unsettled.

South Dakota nest

Winter and darkness have that power.

The present divided loyalties will soon be undivided.

This Lenten season has reminded me of that. What has divided my anxious heart? A desire to be filled by an empty cup, I suppose. But isn’t this the process of Lent? To unsettle the heart of man?

South Dakota calf

It’s a frightening dare to look further into one’s heart.

I find it a bit scary down there.

South Dakota trees

But completely worth it.


36 thoughts on “In the quiet of my heart: unsettled.

  1. I think we all have experienced that unsettled feeling from time to time, some days are worse than others. I believe it could be our inner voice searching out our true life’s purpose which might contradict our current life path that we’ve chosen.

  2. I think winter is more difficult on people who live in remote areas than it is for those of us who live in more populated areas. Even during the most brutal snowstorms, we see our neighbors when we’re outside shoveling and we laugh together, help each other out, and sometimes even share a cup of cocoa afterward. We congregate in stores, malls, cafes, and restaurants, so we’re not really isolated.

    I have no doubt that once you’re completely thawed out, the light will come shining back into your heart again.

    PS- LOVE that second photo!! What a great shot!

  3. A wonderful post, with gorgeous photos. Just before I moved to New Orleans in the summer of ’02, I was living in CT and swear the snow didn’t end. It got to me, it still does. That piercing sense of being unsettled or uncentered is so impacted with the weather, the cold, the dark. Your photos however show such beauty in those chilly times–an important reminder, but oh, it is a hard season to get through, I do know that.

  4. There is something about the Lenten season that challenges us to be something more. I always give something up during this time of year—-not because I have to, but because it is part of a spiritual renewal within me. You hit the nail on the head when you used the word “unsettled”!

  5. I hate feeling unsettled, and I think you kinda nailed it with “made for more.” It’s so easy to get caught up in just living day to day, rather than dreaming, and seeking for the future, and all He has for us to obtain. Hopefully it’s mostly weather induced and things will get better as there is more light at the end of the day. But that usually just allows for more work to fill up that light.
    Take care

    PS.. what did you ever do about that skunk?

  6. I think we all experience a feeling of being unsettled at times. Sometimes, we question the path we are on. Sometimes, it feels like there’s no path at all under our feet. I know for me, when I feel unsettled, there’s a reason, and even if I don’t like it, I have to stop and pay attention. Gorgeous photos!

    • Oh, so very true! I like what you said about sometimes feeling there is not a path under our feet. I often feel lost and misguided, although I know deep down I am exactly where I am supposed to be. I am entering a time of choice: to continue on steadfastly or give in. This Lenten season is a great time for renewed direction for me. Glad you stopped in!

  7. Lovely, thoughtful and honest post — and since I was flying back from seeing my daughter in Rome all day today — flying over the Alps and ocean, Greenland and clouds — I felt unsettled too. Ungrounded, actually. I miss my daughter fiercely and am wondering what comes next when your mothering days are seemingly done. Kinda blue but am also looking forward to the reflection of Lent…and hoping to realize a deeper purpose in these coming days. Love your cows!

  8. I think we all feel that unsettled feeling and seem to want or search for something but we’re not sure want. It’s def worst in cold winter when everything is grey and you can’t see any sunshine on the horizon. I think you should always look into you heart and try and follow what’s there πŸ™‚

  9. I can really, really relate to this. Does the restlessness every go away, do you think? I often wonder how I can be so happy and still so dissatisfied. Maybe this is a common feeling?

    • I am so glad you relate! Sometimes, when I decide to be real about where I am right now, I wonder if it translates well or not.
      About that feeling … For me, faith allows me to believe we were created for something not found on this side of Heaven. Until then, we’ll always be yearning. But I am sure many won’t agree with me, although I think it’s a beautiful thing.
      C.S. Lewis (I find) is much better at capturing this longing through his way of writing and thinking.

    • Ha! Well, I’m not sure how to answer that, I suppose. Everyone seems to celebrate Lent differently, and some not at all. Some of the youth I work with plan to eliminate all negative talking (they’re 13) as a sacrifice. You should have seen how large their eyes grew when I suggested giving up texting. Off with her head!

      Do you do anything for Lent?

      • Well I certainly don’t give up anything! There are various courses we can attend, and now I think about it that means our own little “Cell Group” has been suspended for a few weeks. Roz is doing a course on “Prayer & Fasting” (but I hope she will still cook the meals) and I am on one which is “How to give your faith away!” I’d be tempted to give up paying taxes, but that’s not Biblical.

  10. Always more to life I find myself expanding horizons as well… In the right light a bit of introspection can be helpful, I wouldn’t know what to give up for lent, maybe sweets. I like the Lenton soups at my brothers church service. Very thoughtful post. We set the clocks back tonight for daylight savings what about there? Have a blessed new week(“-“)

  11. I really enjoyed going thru ur photographs. Keep up the good work, I’m looking forward to see more. I’m a new blogger, pls visit my blog for feedback. Thanks πŸ™‚

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