Well, it’s that time of year again. Time for recaps and resolutions, reflection and do-overs. Saying goodbye to 2011 and hello to the new year, to new opportunities, to the chance to try, try again.
Today is also the day I turn 28. Which implies in some small way, with 2012 on the next page, I am also given the opportunity to shed 27 and all that it was and begin fresh with the new year.
Many things have taken place in 2011; the good with the bad. Some of those things we writers choose to share on the blogosphere… and some with only our friends down the road over some coffee and tears.
I joked this morning as I awoke to waffles made by Country Man, that this is a new year, a new me. I pinched the extra skin on my sides that high school me would have fallen over dead upon seeing, and said goodbye to these! He just smiled, of course, because he will be happy either way. Love is funny like that.
If I had to sum up 2011, I would say it was the year of faith testing. The year where I clung hard, painfully so, asked the tough questions, prayed with a flooded heart of broken determination and relentless grit. Faith. Only this old home knows the behind-the-scenes of this true tale.
And that man.
2011 has been a year of wounded souls, depleted spirits, but amazing, amazing grace. Grace not only for myself, but for others. I learned, am learning, that as a human race we like to think we know a lot by what we see, but truly, we have no, none, zero, nth clue about a person’s story. We have to listen. We have to give people a chance. A second. A third. A thousandth.
I can say 2011 has been a year of “knowing”, to realizing I have not a clue about much in life. About people. About God’s people. I learned I am thankful I am not God, that my fellow man is not God. I know a few of the beautiful people who read this blog may have qualms with this talk, but can I encourage you to keep seeking this thing called faith? With me?
2011 has been a year of walking uncertain through a dark, large room, with small hands flailing in front. At first these hands searched desperately, scratching for walls and through the air for some support to rely on. But soon they quieted to my side, surrendered, realizing no crutch would save them. It was like a Deadwood show down; Faith and I. Either I turned to face it, or I’d have to run.
I won’t run…
It’s a strange thing how much beauty can be found living along side darkness…
How love can flourish amidst uncertainty…
How glory can dwell among disaster.
2011… a year to be reckoned with. No matter what 2012 brings, we can do this. There will be nuggets of beauty and mountains of ugly along the way, but we can embrace it.
May 2012 be a year of simpler times, ceaseless wonder, and a multitude of gratitude.